Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
