You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Randomize
