I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I want a musical about memes.
Randomize
