We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
