I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
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