I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
don't judge my taste in strippers
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
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