i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
I think I just sharted jello shots
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
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