Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
