I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Randomize
