There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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