Little spoons don't ask big questions
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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