I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
This house was built for laser tag.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
