so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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