how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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