So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Randomize
