i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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