So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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