Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
