I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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