This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
