i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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