Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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