dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
