Define "chronic" masturbator.
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
