I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
i just google imaged poop.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
I have already put on my inside pants.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
The ass gains better be worth it
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