:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
