well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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