yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
How naked do you want me to be?
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize