I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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