It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Randomize
