I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize
