At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Randomize
