The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
