U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
