Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Randomize
