Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
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