i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize
