Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
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