Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(330): View more from Ohio

How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...

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(908): View more from New Jersey

im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did

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(949): View more from California

I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful

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(973): View more from New Jersey

So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family

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(214): View more from Texas

She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.

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(952): View more from Minnesota

I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.

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(518): View more from New York

Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off

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(703): View more from Virginia

Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.

(703): View more from Virginia

I was wondering where the donuts went.

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