I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Randomize
