Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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