It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
