in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
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