I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
I have post one night stand depression
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize