would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize