even my farts smell like vagina
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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