I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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