normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Just invented taco cereal.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
