It's Friday. Sex?
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
