I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
