I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
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